I'm no fashionista. Some might even say I'm fashion challenged, but those Brown pants? Yuck.

In fact, they were so hideous that maybe they cast some kind of wicked spell on the Browns first-teamers Monday night.

Yes, they were live from New York and they definitely were the Not-Ready-For-Primetime Players and not in the good sense.

Shall we recap the first quarter? Oh, lets:

16 plays for 26 yards
Six penalties for 98 yards
A blocked punt for a safety
The subsequent kick from that safety returned for a touchdown
Said retuner, one Domenick Hixson caught two other TDs from Giants QB Eli Manning
The Giants recover a fumble and return it 80 gazillion yards for a score.
Derek Anderson suffers possible concussion
Pass protection is non-existent
Josh Cribbs injures ankle

Did I leave anything out? Let's face it. This isn't exactly what Browns fans expected in the team's first appearance on national television in umpteen million years. Hell, I'd suspect that even the Miami Dolphins, last year's worst team in the NFL, didn't expect this one. But it happened.

The best thing for the team? First Coach Romeo Crennel and his coaching staff obviously have some work to do with the O-line, the D-line, DBs…Well, can't they just start over? Just kidding.

The fact of the matter is that it's just the second pre-season game. There's still time to get most of these problems corrected.

Secondly, I don't know if a butt kicking like th is in the pre-season is necessarily a bad thing. It kind of serves as a reality check for a young team that is brimming with confidence. Does that confidence come close to arrogance? Not from what I've seen during my many visits to training camp, but still, this could definitely serve as one of those moments when they realize there's hard work to be done and they get down to the business of it.

Here's a plea to the powers that be over at the new SiriusXM company, that newly minted company created by the merger of two struggling satellite radio providers. Do. NOT. I REPEAT. DO.NOT. MAKE. SPORTS.FANS.HAVE.TO.SWITCH.SERVICES.

Like approximately 18.5 million folks out there joined with moi over the years and chucked terrestrial radio for the commercial-free comfort of satellite radio. Trust me, many people I know asked if I was crazy to be paying for radio.

But with the evil Clear Channel empire laying its insidious plot to stamp out originality in local radio broadcasting for the past decade, it was a no brainer for me. Commercial free music, most cable news networks (although I'm still pissed that XM ditched MSNBC from its lineup), and sports, sports and more sports. I was in my version of Nirvana. I could listen to any baseball game I wanted or most any major college football game that I wanted. All I needed was the NFL. Unfortunately, I backed the wrong horse in that race. I had XM and Sirius lured the nation's No. 1 sport to its satellite waves.

But I never wavered, primarily because I'm normally working Sundays during football season anway, but now, I'm hoping that this new behemoth will see the light. How so?

The deal is too complex for my brain at this hour of the night, but here's the gist of their new packages. You can find XM's here.

The plan that most sports fans will likely be interested? the XM and Select Sirius and Sirius and Select XM plans for one simple reason - SPORTS.

With XM having the MLB package and Sirius the NFL and NBA, this is a marriage made in sports heaven. And personally I have little doubt that those packages are among the most popular for each service.

So here's a tip should muckety mucks for either company should be reading (yeah, right), do the right thing and make sure sports fans are taken care of in this deal.

Yes, Alan and Larry, much to your dismay, disdain and disgust, I have returned. I could go into the myriads of reasons about why I stayed away, but I get heckled enough already. I don't really need to give you guys anymore ammunition now, do I.

Anyhoo, on to the business of the day. Or the soap of the month that is - the continuing saga of one Brett Favre. You know that guy - former NFL MVP, Super Bowl quarterback, most durable guy to every play the position. He has a new name now - Man Without a Team.

You see, Ted Thompson, who runs the Green Bay Packers franchise had decided that the future of one of the NFL's most storied franchises is in the hands of one Aaron Rodgers. Yeah this guy:
Rodgers of the 35 completions in 59 pass attempts fame. Yeah, that guy. Listening to the Packers' Thompson earlier today it's clear it's all about his team moving on to the future. Excuse me? Unless you're the New England Patriots, in the NFL the future is now.

When it comes to the Favre soap opera, Thompson should be asking himself one question: Which quarterback gives me the best chance to win the Super Bowl this year? It's not a difficult question to ask and it's not a difficult question to answer. If anyone out there answers anything but "Brett Favre" I want to party with you.

The Packers came within one game of the Super Bowl last year for two big reasons - a young, ferocious defense and a rejuventated Favre. Thompson, may believe that he's doing his fans a favor by moving forward. With all due respect, until Rodgers wins anything any reasonable fan will view it as a general manager who may be allowing his best chance to win a Super Bowl get away.

The NFL schedule is out and the Cleveland Browns saw themselves from starving from lack of respect from TV networks and the schedule making gods last year to gorging on it next season.

The Browns will appear on national television a whopping FIVE times in the 2008 campaign. That's going to make for a lot of late nights in Cleveland.

Here's the rundown:

Pittsburgh Steelers: Sunday, Sept. 14, 8:15 p.m., NBC (WKYC Channel 3)
New York Giants: Monday, Oct. 13, 8:30 p.m., ESPN
Denver Broncos: Thursday, Nov. 6, 8:15 p.m., NFL Network
At Buffalo Bills, Monday, Nov., 17, 8:30p.m., ESPN
At Philadelphia Eagles, Monday, Dec. 15, 8:30 p.m., ESPN

Additionally, one other game, the home opener against the Dallas Cowboys has a 4:15 starting time which means that more than likely it will be the national game for the FOX Network that week. Three other Sunday games also start after 4 p.m.

Find the entire schedule here.

What should Browns fans make of this? First of all, the league rewarded the Browns entertaining play on the field and their perceived status as an up-and-coming team. It will however, mean nothing should they not win.

And at first glance, this schedule is fair to middlin' with respect to difficulty. The combined winning percentage of every team on it is .535. If the Browns have improved the way everyone believes them to have they should have a successful season.

The toughies: Pittsburgh, the Giants, the Jacksonville Jaguars, the Colts (how many of you want payback for them not playing with any desire in their season closer?) and the Titans. That's not to say the rest of the teams on the schedule will be pushovers. Far from it. But the Browns find themselves in an unenviable position - they either perform on the limelight or they likely won't be invited back as often in the future. Additionally, it's going to be interesting to see how this funky schedule affects this team the following week. Three of those national matchup will cause the team to play on short weeks.

I'm trying to decipher what's going on in C-bus lately.

Why?

Because I think the OSU schedule gods are finally listening to the naysayers. You know, the ones who dissed that thing called a schedule last year. Although, in all fairness, that line-up of cream pu…errr…ummm football teams was set up to help a team that was viewed to be in a rebuilding year.

Those critics were right. Last year's schedule wasn't befitting a football program that views itself as a perennial powerhouse. Apparently, however, the times they are a changin'.

The Buckeyes, who previously announced a home-and-home match-up with the Oklahoma Sooners, just announced the same deal with the Tennessee Volunteers. Yes, those Volunteers. That would be an SEC team. In the regular season.

Perhaps they got tired of hearing about all of the experts proclaiming the SEC the best conference - even if it is correct. Even if that is the case, this continues to be a step in the right direction for Buckeyes. It gives them legitimacy in one respect.

However, they will continue to beat up on the state's usual suspects. I have no way of knowing what the future holds, but with these other powerhouses, the Buckeyes need to add one team just below the likes of the Oklahomas and Tennessees to add further legitimacy. The Tennessee series begins in 2018. Gee, get your tickets now.

Look for the Gladiators on these days and times: No broadcast teams have been selected.

3.15.08 at Columbus – 7:00 p.m. Time Warner (Ohio News Network) (LIVE)
Cox (COX 45) (LIVE)
SportsTime Ohio (Tape Delayed, 4:00 p.m. Sunday)
4.19.08 at Los Angeles – 10:30 p.m. FSN Ohio (LIVE)
4.26.08 at New York – 7:00 p.m. FSN Ohio (LIVE)
5.31.08 vs. Dallas – 7:00 p.m. FSN Ohio (LIVE)
6.7.08 vs. Chicago – 7:00 p.m. FSN Ohio (LIVE)
6.14.08 at Philadelphia – 7:00 p.m. FSN Ohio (LIVE)
6.21.08 vs. Columbus – 7:00 p.m. FSN Ohio (LIVE)

It's a goofy game to be sure and although I'm still trying to wrap my head around the AFL's version of America's passion, I'm beginning to develop and affinity for it.

This is where my head has been these past few weeks - hanging around Cleveland Gladiators practices, learning the rules of the game and I've received the pleasure of being assigned to cover the team.

Will it ever equal the NFL in terms of popularity? I highly doubt it, but I will never say never. I will, however, give the brain trust behind Cleveland's second AFL team (the Cleveland Thunderbolts were the first) for putting together an entertaining package. For those who don't know, that would include Bernie Kosar, formerly of the Cleveland Browns.

The game itself is fast paced. I liken it to watching a game of pick-up football in the backyard. It's fun to watch and rarely boring, especially if you like offense.

But what's shocked me is the fact that the crowds have actually shown up the first two game. It was to be expected at the home opener - more than 17K came - but on the day after a snowstorm dumped more than two feet on most people, another 14K watched at the Quicken Loans Arena.

The AFL may have something here. The Gladiators may succeed where the Thunderbolts failed because of stable ownership, a stable league with a national TV contract and a partner in ESPN that has a vested interest in expanding the audience and the league. It doesn't hurt that the team plays in a venue that can't be equated to being a "white elephant on the prairie."

From the Cleveland Browns:

BROWNS AGREE TO TERMS WITH RB JAMAL LEWIS ON A THREE-YEAR DEAL

The Cleveland Browns have agreed to terms on a three-year contract with RB Jamal Lewis through the 2010 season, the club announced today.

Lewis, 5-11 and 245 lbs., finished fifth in the NFL with 1,304 yards rushing last season and also tied for seventh in the league with nine rushing touchdowns. In 2007, Lewis helped propel the Browns rushing attack to rank tenth in the NFL with 118.4 yards per game, the best mark since 1985 when the Browns ranked eighth in the league in rushing.

“I am thankful to the Browns for the opportunity they gave me last year to come out and prove that I was still one of the top running backs in the NFL,” said Lewis. “I feel the future is extremely bright for this team and I’m excited to be a part of it for another three years. I said all year long that I wanted to get a long-term deal done to stay in Cleveland and it looks like with this new contract I will be able to finish my career as a Brown.”

Lewis, 28, had 298 carries for 1,304 yards (4.4 avg.) and nine rushing touchdowns last season and added 30 receptions for 248 yards (8.3 avg.) and two receiving touchdowns. Lewis’ 1,304 yards rushing ranked seventh best in franchise history and his 298 attempts ranked third in team annals. Lewis added five games over 100-yards rushing and became only the 26th running back in NFL history to top 9,000 yards rushing in his career.

“The Browns are pleased that Jamal has decided to continue his career here in Cleveland,” said Phil Savage, Cleveland Browns Senior Vice President and General Manager. “He brings a maturity, toughness and football temperament to the team that is critical to our success on top of the physical abilities that he possesses. Plus, he'll have the opportunity to go over 10,000+ career yards in 2008, which will put him in elite company.”

Was it a witch hunt by those congressional muckety mucks by having Roger Clemens
show up on the Hill to answer questions about his alleged use of steroids and human growth hormone. Oh, joy! Just what I want to hear regurgitated over and over and over…

It's getting to the point to where I am numb on this topic, primarily because it's too little too late. For all practical purposes, the steroids era ended almost six years ago.

Now Congress decides it wants to stick its nose in because someone that stature of Clemens may have actually been a cheater. Wonderful. Apparently they've forgotten it's an election year and people are more concerned about things such as oh, I don't know, the mortgage crisis, a possible recession and the rising cost of health care. I dunno, it seems to me that those itty bitty things might take precedence over a gazillionaire ballpayer who allegedly shot his ass full of muscle medicine.

This all should have been left dead and buried after the Mitchell Report came out in December. Mitchell seemed to take a common sense approach to this entire scenario. It happened. The league was at fault for turning a blind eye and the players were certainly at fault, but it's over. Mitchell recommended no retroactive investigations, but that is being ignored by Congress and my guess would be that baseball czar Bud Selig will do the same. If that's the case he comes across as someone trying to protect a sorry legacy that likely will have little worth remembering when he's done anyway.

Derek Anderson wants more years and Kellen Winslow wants to renegotiate, according to reports.

Hmmm…Is this what success brings? The obvious answer is "yes."

Browns current starting quarterback Derek Anderson turned down a three-year, $17 million contract offer from the Cleveland Browns, according to reports.

For the record, a Beacon Journal report from Marla Ridenour disputes the one linked to above, but for supposition let's just say that Anderson is looking for something longer term.

This one I do not get. Anderson was the Browns starter for 15 games last season and was fairly successful. Apparently he believes that should get him Tony Romo and Matt Schaub like cash.

Hold on there, big guy. I don't think so. One decent season, does not a five-year contract make. Not buy a long shot. Mind you, after the Browns dispensed with Charlie Frye after the home opener debacle against the Steelers way back in September, Anderson showed that he had some skills at the QB position.

Anderson delivered a 10-6 season, but no playoff appearance and it can be argued that he cost the Browns a playoff appearance with some inconsistent play in road games which led to a 3-5 record when away from the comfy confines of Cleveland Browns Stadium. Check out these home stats:

134 of 231 for 1,827 yards, 14 TDs and 6 picks for a 93.5 QB rating.

Look at the road stats:

164 of 296 for 1,920 yards, 15 TDs and 13 picks for a 73.9 QB rating.

What do I remember of Anderson in road games? Throwing one away against the Arizona Cardinals and tossing another away that would have clinched a wildcard berth in Cincinnati in weather that was admittedly not conducive to throwing the ball.

You have to admire Anderson's perseverence and, for now, he has earned the right to be the Browns starting passer going into next season, but he needs to show more before the club invests five years in him and what certainly would be more bonus money.

Winslow's position isn't as cut-and-dried to me. I can certainly see how many fans will view the fact that he's seeking to renegotiate his contract as suspect. That's the way I viewed after his utter lack of maturity his first couple of seasons including the infamous motorcycle accident.

But Winslow has grown since then - by leaps and bounds. He shut his mouth and the megaphone bravado and self-promotion have calmed to a whisper, he still possesses quiet confidence that he shows on the field week after week. He plays hurt, remains productive and has evolved into one of the best tight ends in the game.

The dilemma?

The Browns have stood by him through all of his trials and tribulations over the years - most notably after the motorcycle accident. Sure they docked him some cash, as they should have, but they gave him the chance to make some of that money up by extending his contract.

Should Winslow show a bit more loyalty? Perhaps. I do know one thing, the Browns shouldn't deal with his demands until they've cleared up things with Anderson and running back Jamal Lewis.