Soon enough Nessie will be on Oprah

Posted on September 10, 2009 by Pat McManamon

Back to blogging … and I'm certainly happy the Browns were not entrusted with protecting the secret formula for Coca-Cola.

Now that we know Brady Quinn will indeed start for the Browns – big surprise there, I know – here are the other well-protected secrets of the world that we soon will know:

–The formula for New Coke

–How a scantily clad woman is actually sawed in half by a magician

–The identity of the real killer in the O.J. case

–The secret behind the alien autopsy

–Bigfoot

–The real story of the Loch Ness Monster

I’m open to more.

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5 Responses to Soon enough Nessie will be on Oprah

  1. Elizabeth says:
    September 10, 2009 at 9:39 am

    • Superman's true identity (also see: the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, Santa Claus)

  2. Matt J says:
    September 10, 2009 at 10:20 am

    - The name of the gunman on the grassy knoll
    - The Colonel's blend of 11 herbs and spices

  3. alan t. says:
    September 10, 2009 at 10:33 am

    I thought Nessie *was* Oprah.

  4. Darnell Valentine says:
    September 10, 2009 at 2:27 pm

    who corked Albert Belle's bat

  5. Jim says:
    September 11, 2009 at 3:27 pm

    Just who is "the devil"? As in "the devil made me do it!"