I guess now we’re supposed to feel sorry for Michael Vick. Because he cried when he was in prison
If you don’t want to cry in prison, don’t commit a crime.
Simple proposition.
If you don't want to bleed, don't step on a nail.
If you don't want to have a headache, don't hit yourself in the head with a baseball bat.
If you don't want to get sick, don't drink bad milk.
If you don't want to enjoy Guiness, drink it in the United States (HEY … how'd that get in here?!?)
So … if you don't want to cry because somebody threw your dog-fighting and dog-killing behind in the hoosegow, don't run a dog-fighting operation and don't kill dogs — or at least stop it when you first learn of it. Then you won't have to cry in prison because you've done nothing to make yourself law-abiding until the Feds came knocking on the door.
It’s really not that complex.
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Sign outside the Philadelphia Eagles training camp: "Vick's with the Eagles, lock up your Beagles". Now that'll bring a tear to your eye.
If he cried every night in prison, I must assume he wasn't in the general pop. H e did do 18mo., though, and Cheney and Rummy haven't done a day.
I think he was in one of those prisons where the toughest part of the experience is getting a tennis court reserved on Saturday morning, before it gets too hot. And the pate is indigestible, no matter how many crackers they put on the platter!
Unfortunately, that is exactly the kind of place that The Prince of Darkness & Rumsfeld would end up, even if Congress found the stones to lock em' up.
Bummer.
That sign was made only because they were too dumb to come up with something more clever. That, and next to nothing rhymes with "Eagles." I guess it was better than one of those morons wasting their day to hold up a sign that said, "Vick's with the Eagles, lock up your paralegals." Or, if Jeff Garcia ever returned to the Eagles, "Garcia's with Philly, you'd better lock up Billy."
By the way, there's a huge misconception of why Vick was indicted and went to prison. The guy was indicted for and pled guilty to a count of "conspiracy to travel in interstate commerce in aid of unlawful activities and to sponsor a dog an an animal fighting venture." Not really about killing a dog, per se, but don't tell anybody in PETA that, they'll throw five gallons of red paint on you. And still, everybody and their mother, even everybody in the media who are supposed to know better, truly believe this guy did 18 months for killing a few hundred distant cousins of Spuds McKenzie.