Friends mourn Marine who was like brotherose sons, gain support

 

Published Aug. 12, 2006
By Jim Carney
Beacon Journal staff writer

The phone call came while Mike Gross was swimming with friends Aug. 2.

Gross got on the phone and good friend Matt Lolli began to speak.

``Tomci's not here,'' Lolli said. ``He died this morning.''

Gross thought Lolli was kidding.

``I said, `Is this a sick joke you are playing on me?' ''

``No, man,'' Lolli said. ``This is hard for me to tell you.''

That Wednesday, Gross, Lolli and more than a dozen other lifelong friends who zoomed through the streets of Stow on their bikes as boys, played sports as young men and graduated from Stow-Munroe Falls High School, learned of the death of their motivator, their leader, their pal, their Marine, Joseph Tomci.

These friends, known as the Organization, called each other, e-mailed each other, and sent text messages as word of Tomci's death reverberated through Stow.

``It's been tough for everybody,'' said Joe Walko, a friend of Tomci since middle school.

``The worst is when you are by yourself,'' said Walko, an Ohio State University senior who drove home to Stow from Columbus for the funeral. ``Stuff reminds you of him all the time.''

Tomci, who was on his second tour in Iraq when he was killed in a roadside bombing, kept a picture of his friends in his helmet, Walko said.

``He was a brave, generous guy, an adventurous type,'' Walko said. ``He was always a little bit wild.''

When Tomci was with his friends, said Steve Young, he would tell them ``he was not only serving his country, but he was serving us. He would tell us, `I am going so you don't have to.' ''

Young, 21, a senior at Kent State University, called Tomci, also 21, ``the perfect Marine.''

Young said Tomci ``was the kind of guy who would captivate a room. He was a great storyteller. He loved to joke around.''

Jacob Geopfert, a junior at the Kent State University Stark County campus, remembered Tomci's sense of humor.

Nobody was more dedicated to the fight against terror, said friend Jeffrey Amundsen, 21, a senior at Ohio State University.

``He truly believed in the cause and felt that his actions were changing the world,'' Amundsun said.

Tomci once drove 14 hours to get to Columbus to spend time with his buddies at Ohio State, then drove 14 hours back to Camp Lejeune, N.C., recalled friend Jon Naylor, an Ohio State University student.

``When he was here, it was nonstop laughter as usual,'' Naylor said. ``He also paid for everything. . . . He was that kind of guy.''

Kent State University student Brian McCullough, 21, spoke to Tomci about three weeks ago via satellite phone.

McCullough told Tomci that he had signed a contract to join the Ohio National Guard.

``He was nothing but proud of me and that made me proud,'' recalled McCullough, who leaves for basic training at Fort Benning, Ga., on Aug. 22.

Lolli, a 21-year-old University of Akron student, remembered that Tomci used to wake up early in the summer and come to his house before Lolli's mother left for work.

Tomci would drink coffee with Lolli's mother, then after she left for work, he would roust Lolli out of bed.

``He'd say, `Get up, I got some fun stuff to do today,' '' Lolli remembered. ``A lot of times we did something really stupid, but I loved it. I'd take those days back in a second.''

Tomci's death has made old friend Tony Mancuso realize how short life can be.

``You need to live life to the fullest every day, just like Joe did,'' said Mancuso, 21, of Stow, a part-time police officer for Wellsville.

He said he and Tomci had planned on being best man at their weddings someday. ``Words can't even express what he meant to me,'' Mancuso said.

Gross paints a picture of the last time he saw his friend.

It was after a weekend of hanging out in North Carolina before Tomci left for his second tour in Iraq.

``I said, `You're coming home,' '' Gross remembered.

``He said, `Dude, anything can happen.' ''

Gross told his friend, ``Dude, you gotta come home.''

And then Gross, Lolli and friend Greg Lambach hugged Tomci and got in their car and drove off.

``I was driving,'' he said. ``I remember looking in the rearview mirror. He didn't move until we were out of sight.''

Gross will remember all of the stories, every single scene from the Joe Tomci story, when he writes his friend's eulogy.

``I've got to keep him in my head,'' he said.